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[chernyy]

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2/2

[chernyy]

And it's not that I don't like you. I barely know you. But I know what was done to you and I know you're important to Steve. I will help you if I can.

[wipedclean]

[There's a long pause before he responds. Five minutes.]

thank you.

[chernyy]

Don't thank me yet.

Just try to take it easy. Deep breaths, yoga, meditation, whatever.

[wipedclean]

i have been.

i was doing okay. better.

but hydra made me to be a killer and i'm not sure i can ever completely get away from that.

private;

[chernyy]

I was made to be one and I got away from it. You can, too.

private;

[wipedclean]

how long is it going to take?

seventy years doesn't just go away.

i was doing okay here because i didn't have a constant reminder of myself in my face except for what my own brain fed me.

but now he's here and it doesn't matter what his intentions are, all i see when i look at him is going to be what they did to me.

private;

[chernyy]

It took time for them to do what they did, it will take time to move beyond it.

You have to decide whether you are stronger than them or not. Whether you want to live a life beyond what they did to you or not.

I remember every day what has been done to me and what I did. I was reminded of it constantly. I live with it. I don't let it rule over me.

private;

[wipedclean]

i'm trying

i've been trying every single goddamn day since i got here

i wasnt strong enough before what if ill never be strong enough

private;

[chernyy]

Keep trying.

You never will be if you keep telling yourself you won't.

[ Russian tough love, Bucky. ]

private;

[wipedclean]

[Well that's what he needs right now.

It's another long pause before he manages to respond again.]

ok

[chernyy]

[ She leaves it at that, not having anything else to say on the matter.

For now, at least. ]